• Do Bodies Count?

    I don’t know how many people I’ve had sex with. I don’t know how many have penetrated me, how many have brought me to orgasm, how many dicks I’ve sucked. I’m not sure how many genitals I’ve seen in real life or how many have seen mine. How many flies have I zipped open with…

  • A Normal, Human Body

    I hate writing this. I hate that I have to. I hate that I’ve written it before and I continue to write about it because the same shit keeps happening every single year.  It’s January and the diet and wellness industry is in heat. They’re horny not for your health, but for your money. They…

  • NSFW: The Pictures I Send Lovers

    Do you want a photo of me? Do you want a shot of my body, my face, my expression as I climax? Do you want something to look at while you’re alone, desperately wishing I was there with you? Do you want something to help you imagine touching me anywhere you want to? Do you…

  • Erotic Fiction: Tell Me What You Need

    The most intriguing guy had just walked into the hotel bar. I wish I’d seen him enter and watched his strong stride from the far end of the room, but my attention was on the bright laptop screen, freckled with coffee from an accident the week before. I’d rewritten the same sentence 7 times even…

  • NSFW: Who’s there?

    The pub was closing early. The two members of staff were busying themselves behind the bar and every glance in our direction was a plea for us to leave so they could go home. You told me you didn’t want the night to end here; there’d been laughter and anticipatory touches and plenty of eye-fucking…

  • NSFW: Planning My First Orgasm of 2023

    Yes, yes, New Years is a somewhat benign and meaningless measure of time passing slowly as we all contemplate our shortcomings and regrets and weight while the Earth literally burns around us and we all trudge towards an inevitable death brought about by age, avoidable disease, or poverty. But, but, I feel my first orgasm…

  • NSFW: The Switch

    I like it when an old fuck gets back in touch. They must have been reminiscing about me, my body, maybe what I can do with my mouth. They must have been feeling horny, feeling excited, feeling perhaps a little desperate. The first time round must have been good enough to merit a sequel, hopefully.…

  • NSFW: My First Sex Party

    “Are you here all by yourself? Well, you soon won’t be”  My first erotic story, written when I was 19 or 20, was about a woman who goes to a sex party for the first time, by herself, to live her greatest fantasies. And here I am, going to a sex party for the first…

  • The Good, The Bad, and The Smug

    I don’t fancy the guy who’s giving me head. The head is OK, the guy is OK, but I’m lying here, thighs spread, and my mind is gently drifting away. I’m not questioning why I don’t fancy him, there’s no panic or insecurity; I’m calm in my indifference. It’s like coming down in the morning…

  • Great Aural

    The other night, a guy made me soaking wet by imitating the Barnsley accent of his girlfriend. Someone growling deeply into my ear as they fuck me from behind causes delicious palpitations. I am far, far more likely to go on a date with you if you’re from Manchester or Glasgow than the Home Counties.…

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